Lineages of Love

FUTURE ONES

The heart is a worthy investment

The return to something ancient

Joy is the resistance to war.

The cultural laugh that cannot be broken.

Tiny threads can make big weaves.

So, they weave the holes in the fabric of love tirelessly.

Spider, grandmothers, grandfathers.

The sun fortifies lineages of love.

The wind erodes away calcified pain.

The storm rattles sleeping spirits.

THe river brings back memories

As new born eyes open again,

The heart leading the way.

GRANDMOTHERS

Wrapping hands around mine,

light gold pearls.

Massaging oil into my fingertips,

they hearld me to see the trove of my inheritance.

Worthiness drips from my being like gold,

I bathe in this, holding this heart proud.

I covet my body, my heart and this being.

This spirit.

They teach me how to not please.

To say it, how I feel it, with kindness.

To get clear and then to be clear.

To fortify values.

To stand in my worth, naked.

TENDING

Tending the heart, the knots that form there when I move through life.

Tending dreams and destiny.

Tending soil, stone, feet on a mountain.

Tending grief between bones.

Tending the whisper in my heart.

Tending the sweetness of children.

Tending the quiet moments of soul’s intimacy.

Tending love, as if it were the sweet nectar of flowers that greet me at each morning’s wake.

REMNANTS

Debris lifts and arrives on the surface,

like breakfast with my morning tea.

Debris, I’ve understood as patterns,

karmic bonds sifting its way through my dreams.

An attitude of watching “ what is here?”

“what are these tangles?”

The fog is easy to dismiss, if I let it.

Yet curiosity lends details,

I am able to sense make.

Be with.

The slight form,

that choices,

have carved on my heart,

like crevices.

RESPONSIBILITY

May my heart respond to yours,

When I am unable, let me be here till I can.

When I can, let me have the courage to speak true words kindly.

May I gaze into your eyes with care.

May I hold your heart with respect and love.

May the resounding sanctity be preserved somehow,

The precious flower’s essence.

May our commitments to love, be to preserve love.

I wonder what effect this could have?

Perhaps, the ripples can transpire torn hearts

Braiding across time, space and geographical location.

Perhaps, it can make the suffering dead, joyous

In the realms that they walk.

How we can affect each other,

just by heart.

EXPANSION
The heart expands as if,

like a balloon being supplied with air.

All the crevices of collapse and pain have received this joyous invitation.

They are being seen.

The sun perches,

The deer, bear and elephant have

gathered for the celebration.

The hummingbird have brought a sweet choir.

The trees sway in the wind,

The smell of the Earth is a reminder of soul’s essence,

And the song of heart, bellows

having received her birthright.

WELLSPRING

Pearls gathered, collected in a basket’s weave.

The essence of my grandmother, my nani in my hair.

Her scent captured in my bones.

Memories I can access by being in my heart.

The lineage we are joined from,

that space between ribs,

where my ancestral kin dwell,

The hues of purple and pink,

A setting sun,

A dawning light.

Etched across a pool of water,

A meeting place.

A sanctuary of all the women that have come before me.

Spring Blessings

Blessings of this new season to you and your cherished loved ones.

Have you considered the rituals and practices that you hold close, especially during the transition of seasons?

For me, it has been the practice of relating to the water spirits. I am cultivating a relationship with the river Puntledge. I was called to do this practice by my wise and kind ancestral guides. My simple ritual has been to sit a few minutes each day and listen. It has been a sweet practice, thus far. It is becoming clear to me, that my closest council now includes this river spirit and I feel much gratitude in my heart for this listening.

I went away for four days to visit my dearest friend on Cortes Island and I missed sitting beside the river. When I returned to my sit spot, I felt the river in my heart, as a song. To belong in the hearts of more than my best friends is new for me. This way of relating is anchoring, invigorating and is providing breadth to my daily life. It fills my heart with joy, in ways that I only dreamed that belonging was possible. I know this relating will continue to deepen, just like most relationships do for the rest of my living life on Earth and beyond. For this, I am excited in my bones!

What I am most fascinated by though, is how my relationships with human folk has become more, shall I say forgiving? regular sized? compassionate?

I am noticing how I had placed more weight on relationships with humans vs the animate world. Even though, I’ve had a relational practice for a while now, it is changing to also include the way I inhabit the animate (earth, water, fire and air). I am allowing the animist relating practices to take up real-estate in my day-to-day living in a larger way.

AND it is changing  the way I breathe and inhabit my body.

I am noticing what pace is natural for me, how to stay rooted to my own heart. I am also learning the process of being an interconnected species. I am considering the relationship between the waters in my body and the water spirits of the river.

In these moments, there is a feeling of intimacy that is palpable. 

I am sitting with this, how can relating with the spirit of water bring me into closer relationship to my own spirit? What does this reciprocal relationship look like? 

I am holding wonderment as my curiosities speak like flowers to each other and I feel rested inside of myself for the braiding that is taking place in this moment.

Right place & auntyhood

My whole heart is bursting! I just spent two whole days with my niece (by choice). It has me deeply reflecting on the role of aunties in communities.

Growing up, I had lots of aunties. I loved being doted on and seen through the eyes of different people. Since moving provinces, I’ve noticed that I miss the intimacy of being among familial community that existed in this way. I didn’t know I secretly longed for this, till I was anticipating Rosie’s visit.

When I went to my brother’s wedding 5 years ago, I had a sweet encounter with an aunty. It took her a minute to recognize me because it had been a while since our last visit. She was able to reflect the changes she saw me with tenderness, pride and happiness. She celebrated me in that moment, in a way that I didn’t know I needed and I will always cherish that.

When I see Rosie and the little person she inhabits, it brings me joy. We play together and when I am silly with her, she says “Silly Masi”. When she is bubbling with joy because we are doing something fun, she will declare “ I really love you, Masi”. I love the way she expresses herself and her parents have taught her so well, how to do this.

She joins me in drawing her dreams in the morning, speaking to the river, and listening to stories of my aunties as I massage her little toes.

We read three books together before she goes to bed and when the lights are turned off, she will ask me to tell her a story of my own. This is my favorite part, because I don’t know the story that would come through me. I am usually listening for my ancestors to guide here, which they do lovingly!

I sent my aunty Sheila a message recently letting her know just how much I value her and thanking her for the memories we’ve made together. She reflected on the unconditional love of her own aunties that she misses and loves so much. She was grateful for my message that meant the world to her and would forever treasure our precious moments.

I wholeheartedly welcome holding joy to witness Rosie and ( my 3 other nieces and nephew) grow and inhabit their right place in this world. I am holding in my heart what it means to be ushered into the responsibilities of this aunty role. I feel so grateful to be part of these little humans’s lives.

Ancestor relating.

I’ve taken to drawing my dreams as I wake. I use pastels as my medium and allow images to be expressed on the paper in front of me. I lean into my senses, my fingers reach for the colours. The images build upon themselves. I allow the images to speak.

A cool thing happened yesterday. I was reading to my niece at night, as I opened the storybook, I noticed a similar peculiar image that I recognized from the drawing I made in the morning. It made me excited. I love when the dots connect and the communication flows from the dreamscape into the waking world!

I am sharing below a writing piece that feels like this image I drew after waking. I am working on my secondary lineage on my mother’s line and these words are resonant of that journey.

The veil lifts so I can see the path ahead of me beaded with flowers. The smell beckons my heart forward, bringing me to sweetness, innocence and possibility. The heavy garb of burdensome stories falls of my back like it never belonged. It is replaced by iridescent wings of silk that are soft. My smile is widened, my heart ripples open so expansive that I no longer shield the love that pours through me. I learn to yeild my sword of wisdom. It stays in its sheath, till it is needed in my palms and I trust this. These are the glimpses when the veil lifts, this is the moment I am taken to.